I know I said I'd tell you about my life piece by piece but I think these are the most important things I can say about it:
~I lost someone...a long time ago. Other then my mother. It was after that. I told you about Angel right? WEll we were friends, back then he had an older brother. I would talk to Angel all the time...he was my comfort, my support. After my life plummeted to hell. I would go to his house everyday, all day whenever I can. At first it was to seek solace. But after a while, I fell for his older brother Michael, who would comfort me when Angel was gone. We were close after a year of constant contact. Almost a classic love story right? He loved me and I loved him. But I had abandoned Angel. Though we remained friends. One day, Michael was taking me to see my parents, at their graves. He said something that caused more sadness and wasn't intended. We got into an argument over something petty and the next day I wouldn't talk to him. So I sought Angel's comfort. He talked me into speaking with his brother again. So I went to find him, when I did find him he was in his room muttering. Most likely sending up prayer, and saying how sorry he was for upsetting me. I was about to say something when he said he could never forgive himself for murdering my family. I took him literally, thinking he really killed my father, and perhaps even my mother. Although I knew she'd taken her own life. So, being in the emotional state that I was in I freaked out. I asked him how he could do such a thing. We got into another fight...I hit him multiple times causing a bloody lip. He refused to fight back, and I didn't stop. In the end...I killed him, and he hadn't touched me once. I stared down at him...loathing written on my face mixed with other emotions. Angel chose then to walk into the room. He saw his brother dead on the floor, took one look at me and broke down. I ran...going to the darkest place I knew. It was two days later that I discovered what Michael had meant. He had been with my father when he was killed. Michael felt responsible for the murder, and thus the death of my mother. He'd felt bad because he couldn't do anything to prevent it. I killed Michael for caring. Horror swept over me quickly and I detached myself from the world for the next four days. I went to Michaels funeral the fifth day and placed a black rose on his casket. The next day I took my life.~
--Two years later I was reborn. In a week I reunited with Angel. He was with a new family and had a little sister. After a short while I fell for him like I had his brother. Though soon he remembered the pain I had caused him, how it was my fault that his family broke apart. He blamed me for everything and cast me away--
Now, I no longer see him. He won't look at me. Don't ask about times and how long ago this all is...I couldn't tell you.
The feelings after death surrender to nothing,
Loraina Kiarwa
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
How long
I will tell you who I am at the then end of this post. I just thought I should say something...or do something. Because no one knows me or anything. Except Angel. But he doesn't talk to me anymore. But it's fine. How long does it take people to know you exactly? Hm...Maybe I'll tell you about my life. So then, you can say "Hey...I've read about her." When you hear my name. Okay? Uh...I won't start from the beggining that would take much too long. I'll just write about the "highlights" in my life. So I'll start from about 10 years ago. When I first met Angel.
~"Lora..? Lora... wake up honey." my mom spoke from above my bed. It was raining outside, my favorite kind of weather, until then. I looked up at my mothers face. Tears ran down her cheeks, her eyes puffy from her obvious crying. I sat bolt upright, looking her in the eyes and half already knowing what she would say. "What's wrong mama?" I asked, dread circling my heart. "I-it's your father baby...I'm afraid..." she broke out in tears then, and she didn't have to say anymore.
The next week we went to his funeral. She never told me how he died, or where or when. I wasn't sure I wanted to know at that point. I looked up at the sky while my grandpa spoke over father's casket. I looked up at the sky, hoping the sun would wash away my doubts, and worries. They didn't. Turning my head I saw a little boy. His hair was down to his waist, and he sat in a tree staring curiously at me. Looking around I walked over to the tree, wiping my face before looking up at him once more. "H-hello" I said smiling sadly. "Hey" he replied. "Who are you?" I blinked staring at him. "Angelo. But you can call me Angel" He smiled at me then, the most reassuring thing I'd seen in all my life. Though being six it hadn't been that long. He hopped down from the tree and stood infront of me. "How old are you?" I asked. "9" he told me. I nodded. "Wanna be friends?" I tilted my head to the side, the way I'd seen my sister do. "Sure." He stuck out his hand, and I shook it.
6 months later, my mother commited suicide. It was May 18th. Two days after my 7th birthday. We held her funeral a week from that date, and Angel was there. To comfort me. Telling me he knew how it felt. After that day, I never left his side for moment.~
I'll write about the most important parts of my life. One year at a time, every time I post. So then you'll know why I'm the way I am now. I suppose you could call it a kind of auto biography. *shrugs* But I'm sure most of you won't really care much about my life. That's really all I have to talk about right now. I could tell you many a tragic story. For my life is full of them...but I won't yet.
Love to the strangers,
~Loraina Kiarwa~
~"Lora..? Lora... wake up honey." my mom spoke from above my bed. It was raining outside, my favorite kind of weather, until then. I looked up at my mothers face. Tears ran down her cheeks, her eyes puffy from her obvious crying. I sat bolt upright, looking her in the eyes and half already knowing what she would say. "What's wrong mama?" I asked, dread circling my heart. "I-it's your father baby...I'm afraid..." she broke out in tears then, and she didn't have to say anymore.
The next week we went to his funeral. She never told me how he died, or where or when. I wasn't sure I wanted to know at that point. I looked up at the sky while my grandpa spoke over father's casket. I looked up at the sky, hoping the sun would wash away my doubts, and worries. They didn't. Turning my head I saw a little boy. His hair was down to his waist, and he sat in a tree staring curiously at me. Looking around I walked over to the tree, wiping my face before looking up at him once more. "H-hello" I said smiling sadly. "Hey" he replied. "Who are you?" I blinked staring at him. "Angelo. But you can call me Angel" He smiled at me then, the most reassuring thing I'd seen in all my life. Though being six it hadn't been that long. He hopped down from the tree and stood infront of me. "How old are you?" I asked. "9" he told me. I nodded. "Wanna be friends?" I tilted my head to the side, the way I'd seen my sister do. "Sure." He stuck out his hand, and I shook it.
6 months later, my mother commited suicide. It was May 18th. Two days after my 7th birthday. We held her funeral a week from that date, and Angel was there. To comfort me. Telling me he knew how it felt. After that day, I never left his side for moment.~
I'll write about the most important parts of my life. One year at a time, every time I post. So then you'll know why I'm the way I am now. I suppose you could call it a kind of auto biography. *shrugs* But I'm sure most of you won't really care much about my life. That's really all I have to talk about right now. I could tell you many a tragic story. For my life is full of them...but I won't yet.
Love to the strangers,
~Loraina Kiarwa~
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Never Realized...
----- Ryojin
It's hard to see things as they truly are until they are snapped into perspective by some great event. What I mean is I never realized how small I really am until earlier today. My Mother is small, short. My Father is quite tall compared to me. My other form is the biggest out of my brothers and sisters, but...I thoroughly deserve the title 'pup' compared to my Father. My sisters were testing their other forms earlier when they had the brilliant idea to ask dad to change for them. Of course he said no. But they pulled out the big guns (Tesu) and he finally agreed. It took only a few seconds, even my Mother was amazed at the sheer size. My brothers and I had initial instinct to cower at first. My sisters stood there in awe, and my Mother, she smiled. She smiled and sat beside him when he lie down. It was quite a scene. Though now I understand why my Father laughs when we talk about who's stronger than who and who is bigger. Because we had no idea. When he changed back, my brother asked him why he never changes. My father said he didn't enjoy that form as much as his human one, and I understand. My little sister however, enjoys the form a lot. She has a lot more freedom then. I'm sure she'll tell you about it herself eventually. I will never forget this day.
Taking Time,
Ryojin 'Kyosera'
----- Shiroi
I know my brother told you about what happened today already, but I had to voice it as well. Because....Holy crap. I could not believe my eyes. We're going to see if Uncle Shunukasun will do it next. Then Uncle Lie, or Uncle Hito. We want to see how small we are compared to them. Normally I don't want any attention drawn to how short I am, but now I want to know. Just how small am I? I was almost scared standing next to my dad in his other form. He towered over me by like fifty feet. I could be exaggerating. But who cares. I know what I saw. It was so cool anyway. There's food cooking. Peace.
Lovin' Family,
Shiroi 'Kyosera'
It's hard to see things as they truly are until they are snapped into perspective by some great event. What I mean is I never realized how small I really am until earlier today. My Mother is small, short. My Father is quite tall compared to me. My other form is the biggest out of my brothers and sisters, but...I thoroughly deserve the title 'pup' compared to my Father. My sisters were testing their other forms earlier when they had the brilliant idea to ask dad to change for them. Of course he said no. But they pulled out the big guns (Tesu) and he finally agreed. It took only a few seconds, even my Mother was amazed at the sheer size. My brothers and I had initial instinct to cower at first. My sisters stood there in awe, and my Mother, she smiled. She smiled and sat beside him when he lie down. It was quite a scene. Though now I understand why my Father laughs when we talk about who's stronger than who and who is bigger. Because we had no idea. When he changed back, my brother asked him why he never changes. My father said he didn't enjoy that form as much as his human one, and I understand. My little sister however, enjoys the form a lot. She has a lot more freedom then. I'm sure she'll tell you about it herself eventually. I will never forget this day.
Taking Time,
Ryojin 'Kyosera'
----- Shiroi
I know my brother told you about what happened today already, but I had to voice it as well. Because....Holy crap. I could not believe my eyes. We're going to see if Uncle Shunukasun will do it next. Then Uncle Lie, or Uncle Hito. We want to see how small we are compared to them. Normally I don't want any attention drawn to how short I am, but now I want to know. Just how small am I? I was almost scared standing next to my dad in his other form. He towered over me by like fifty feet. I could be exaggerating. But who cares. I know what I saw. It was so cool anyway. There's food cooking. Peace.
Lovin' Family,
Shiroi 'Kyosera'
Monday, October 02, 2006
The Situation...
Here's the situation:
Your walking down a path, your boyfriend is following you protectively (not stalkerish) and you come accross your Ex. You stop and chat with him, then continue on your way. Your boyfrined stops and chats with him as well and continues to follow you. The next day you travel down the same path and see your Ex again. You repeat yesterdays events. But when your boyfriend talks to him you hear a snap and one set of footsteps continuing. You look back and see the only your boyfriend is left. You ask him about it later and he says "I don't know where he went." What do you do?
Me personally, I'm used to it. He does this all the time. Of course today was just....unessecary. He took out his frustration on someone who didn't deserve it. It's just plain rude if you ask me. However, I won't say anything more about it. Matter of fact...nevermind.
Sexy Love,
Arelav
Your walking down a path, your boyfriend is following you protectively (not stalkerish) and you come accross your Ex. You stop and chat with him, then continue on your way. Your boyfrined stops and chats with him as well and continues to follow you. The next day you travel down the same path and see your Ex again. You repeat yesterdays events. But when your boyfriend talks to him you hear a snap and one set of footsteps continuing. You look back and see the only your boyfriend is left. You ask him about it later and he says "I don't know where he went." What do you do?
Me personally, I'm used to it. He does this all the time. Of course today was just....unessecary. He took out his frustration on someone who didn't deserve it. It's just plain rude if you ask me. However, I won't say anything more about it. Matter of fact...nevermind.
Sexy Love,
Arelav
Monday, September 25, 2006
A Tour of my Heart
I really shouldn't be here...not by myself. It's not healthy anymore. I need someone. To stay with me all the time. Phury does. But he's not here now...next to me. Holding my hand. That's because he can't be while I'm here. The most he can do at this point is talk to me. I came because I wanted to read something....that's important to me now. It wasn't before. In fact, some one could've burned it and I wouldn't have given so much as a second glance. But now...now I need it. It's one of my ties to reality. *sighs* If you know me...you understand the reason for that. If you don't...you'll have to get along not knowing. I wrote a poem earlier, it's odd. I don't really like it. But it helped me a little. And compelled me to write to the world...like I'm currently doing. Would you like to read it? Like I said, it kind of suck, because I'm not one for poetry. But bear with me please:
R.I.P Riukuru
I send my love to paradise,
Rioriki Lee Fe Tazuna
A Tour of my Heart
My heart aches to be with you,
I just can't see me without you,
At this point in my life,
I wish only to hear you,
To argue,
To be wanted by you,
My mind swirls in the loss,
Once my love, now my pain,
I don't think it will ever be the same,
Without you near me,
I can only stare blankly,
~I sing this song in the name of my love,
The one I lost to a chaotic soul,
I sing this song as my heart floats above,
I can't help but lose all control,
I will extend this invitation,
To a tour of my heart,
~I can't say goodbye,
Not yet, not now,
Only you can satisfy,
The quick pounding of my heart,
For now, I'll just fall apart,
This must punishment,
For what I've done, what I am,
The ultimate judgment,
By burning my heart,
As only a death can,
I can't take the pain,
Not by myself, not alone,
I can't stand the rain,
With you I found a home,
~I sing this song in the name of my love,
The one I lost to a chaotic soul,
I sing this song as my heart floats above,
I can't help but lose all control,
I will extend this invitation,
To a tour of my heart,
~Two things keep me here,
Two things I hold dear,
For the rest of my life,
They promised to help me through this strife,
One lies within me,
The other is by my side,
One of them you gave me,
The other one stands by,
This impossible heart ache,
Threatens to devour me,
This insatiable need to see you,
Torments me,
I was happy once,
As I hope to be again,
They tell it's what you'd want,
Should I believe them?
~This torrent wind pulls at my mind,
I may lose myself to your death in time,
But as you once said,
"I can't live my life dead"
So I will survive with your voice in my head,
And my heart will remain,
Cold and still in the rain,
Which reminds me of you,
And all that you do,
For to me you still live,
As you once truly did,
And I'll smile for a while,
When I see your face in my dreams,
And live in this world,
Desolate as it may be,
~I sing this song in the name of my love,
The one I lost to a chaotic soul,
I sing this song as my heart floats above,
I can't help but lose all control,
I will extend this invitation,
To a tour of my heart...
~Rioriki Lee Fe Tazuna~
I hope Phury stays with me...I don't know how we would survive without him. Yes, I know I said we...you can figure that out your self. I also hope ~Riukuru~ is happy where he is. *smiles*
R.I.P Riukuru
I send my love to paradise,
Rioriki Lee Fe Tazuna
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
How is this at all possible?
--Naname'--
Now people...you may wonder...what the hell is she talking about?! That, I will explain in a matter of moments. But first, I have to tell you that I am extremely irritated by people who think they know it all but when I say all...I mean ALL. I'm talking about the people who believe everything they do, and everything they say...is right. Never wrong but always and forever right. HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE!!! I mean unless your the creator of the universe, and you know all the answers to lifes questions. Then you don't know everything!!! Trust me...it's true. Now, to the point. Not only is there someone like that at my host's school. But there's someone like that in the pack!! They just don't admit they're wrong. Like ever! I swear it pisses me off. Not only that but the dude thinks he's the toughest nut to crack. No one can beat him or hurt him or anything. You know why? Because he knows everything...and I'm the master of the underworld. *rolls her eyes* Like that would ever happen. Not only is he a know it all...but he frightens me. The guys sadistic... he's always got some kind of sharp object with him. And he seems to like to show it off to me. I hate it, it scares me. It makes me want to jump under a boulder and hide there the rest of my life. I told Lord Darius about it, but he said he allows weapons within the pack. And if he took that guys away, he'd have to take everbodies. And then it would be never ending chaos. He's got a point. I can't be mad at the guy for wanting to be my friend and all, but I get the feeling that if I let him to close he'll skin me. Or something. The way he holds it seems like a threat. I'm not good with stuff like that...not since my brothers...Anyway, the guys weird. But he's part of the pack *sighs* I have to accept him. I think I need a body gaurd. How is it possible for someone to be so freaking nuts?!!! On a better note I have a dancing partner I don't know for how long, but still! The Scholars cool, I think his real name is Osumaru but I call him Scholar. He's younger then me. But I like him, he's not retarded or immature. And really, he's not that much younger then me. Hehehehehe. I just met him like a few weeks ago. We're friends now! Weee *smiles* lol anyway. I'm out of this joint. Hehe j/k.
Love Always,
Naname' (nah-nah-may(or nah-nah-meh))
P.S. I think the know it all psycho guy should meet the Scholar. Maybe it'll help his sanity a bit more. lol
Now people...you may wonder...what the hell is she talking about?! That, I will explain in a matter of moments. But first, I have to tell you that I am extremely irritated by people who think they know it all but when I say all...I mean ALL. I'm talking about the people who believe everything they do, and everything they say...is right. Never wrong but always and forever right. HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE!!! I mean unless your the creator of the universe, and you know all the answers to lifes questions. Then you don't know everything!!! Trust me...it's true. Now, to the point. Not only is there someone like that at my host's school. But there's someone like that in the pack!! They just don't admit they're wrong. Like ever! I swear it pisses me off. Not only that but the dude thinks he's the toughest nut to crack. No one can beat him or hurt him or anything. You know why? Because he knows everything...and I'm the master of the underworld. *rolls her eyes* Like that would ever happen. Not only is he a know it all...but he frightens me. The guys sadistic... he's always got some kind of sharp object with him. And he seems to like to show it off to me. I hate it, it scares me. It makes me want to jump under a boulder and hide there the rest of my life. I told Lord Darius about it, but he said he allows weapons within the pack. And if he took that guys away, he'd have to take everbodies. And then it would be never ending chaos. He's got a point. I can't be mad at the guy for wanting to be my friend and all, but I get the feeling that if I let him to close he'll skin me. Or something. The way he holds it seems like a threat. I'm not good with stuff like that...not since my brothers...Anyway, the guys weird. But he's part of the pack *sighs* I have to accept him. I think I need a body gaurd. How is it possible for someone to be so freaking nuts?!!! On a better note I have a dancing partner I don't know for how long, but still! The Scholars cool, I think his real name is Osumaru but I call him Scholar. He's younger then me. But I like him, he's not retarded or immature. And really, he's not that much younger then me. Hehehehehe. I just met him like a few weeks ago. We're friends now! Weee *smiles* lol anyway. I'm out of this joint. Hehe j/k.
Love Always,
Naname' (nah-nah-may(or nah-nah-meh))
P.S. I think the know it all psycho guy should meet the Scholar. Maybe it'll help his sanity a bit more. lol
Monday, September 18, 2006
Suya Said...
This is probably a huges mistake....the Masters will find out about this somehow and be angry with me...but Suya said it was okay....she said I should...so I suppose....She said I'm supposed to write about my past so it wasn't torturing my mind. I don't think it is...but I'll listen to her. I don't know how to start...Hm...I know.
December 19
"If you do it, I'll leave."
"No you won't, boy stop lying."
"I'm completely serious, dad. I'll leave."
"Isaac..perhaps...he is serious.."
"Nonsense, Kane."
"It isn't nonsense, dad!"
"You see? He's not kidding."
"We'll see then, Arden. We'll see."
"Hmph."
The voices of my Father, my Mother, and my older brother echoed through the hallways into my room. Their comtemplation of this painful matter kept me awake. Of course when conserning me, nothing is simple. Everyone has sacrificed something for me, has even given away their most precious belonging to spare me...except for my Father. He has given nothing, yet taken so much. I begin crying, self hatred washing through me once again, for causing m family so much distress. Arden comes quickly to my room. He lifts me from my bed, with one arm.
"Stop crying, Noden. It's not your fault."
"It is..."
"It is not. Stop blaming yourself right now."
"O-okay.."
I choke back my tears and wipe my face, he smiles at me. I notice he's missing two of his front teeth. I tentatively ask him what happened. He explains that he lost them in a fight. I'll be it was because of me. He sets me down again and leans against me bed, pushing his oddly long blonde hair behind his ear.
"Can you sleep now, Noden?"
"Will you stay untill I do?"
"Yeah, I can do that."
He sta on the edge of my bed and decided to hum a song he wrote for me at that moment. I fell asleep quickly, so I know not how long he was there. But I'm sure it was a while because one day he told me how he enjoys watching me sleep. The next day I woke to the sound of Arden screaming at the top of his lungs. It hurt his throat I could tell. My Mother spoke next when he stopped.
"Arden, baby please. There's nothing we can do. We need the money..."
"So your going to sell my baby brother?! He's not even a year old!"
"I know...this isn't easy for me either..."
"But your going to allow it! Your going to let them take him! Just snatch him from our lives and act like he was never there? Don't you think he might remember us?!"
"He's too young to remember this..."
"How would you know? You don't talk to him! You don't even tuck him in at night. Your not by his side when he cries! You act like you don't recognize his face when you see him!"
"Arden...please..."
As I sat up, tears beginning to fill my eyes, I heard my Fathers voice boom throughout the house. I flinched, quietly, I had to see. I had to know. I had to see their faces one last time. I climbed out of bed and padded down the hall, to the kitchen where they held every argument.
"Your not making this any easier, Arden."
"So!? Your selling your own flesh and blood."
"Oh my god...we're horrible people..."
My Mother began to cry, bloody tears escaped her eyes, falling through the curtain of snow white hair that framed her face. My big brother glared at her briefely, before realizing that she too, was feeling quite upset about this. That his true enemy was only Father.
"Your trying to tear us all apart aren't you?"
"Why would I be trying to tear apart my own family?"
"Your giving up both of your sons. And slowly killing your wife. You tell me."
"Stop talking."
My Father turned and stalked out of the room ending the conversation. Arden turned to my Mother and spoke softly. Questioning when they were coming to take me. She spoke quietly as well, he looked over at me.
"Go get dressed."
"What for, Arden?"
"Now, Noden."
I nodded briskly and rushed off to my room, changing as uickly as possible. He came in a few moments later, stuffing money into my pocket. He beckoned me to follow him, after I had put on my shoes. He stopped at the kitchen doorway, where Mother stood, holding our coats, holding back tears.
"Good luck, I love you both."
"I love you too, mom."
"I love you Shifiro. I'm sorry."
"I love you too, Mother.."
She gave us our coats and kissed us quickly, before turning away. She couldn't handle watching us leave. I knew I walked slowly, but never slowly enough for Arden to pick me up and run with me. He ran briskly, making no sound. When he stopped his eyes were blank, aimless.
"Brother?"
"I love you, Noden."
"A-Arden?"
Before I knew it I was ripped from my brothers arms. By someone much larger, stronger than him. I screamed his name, when I began drifting from him, the part between us becoming greater and greater. I heard him say my name before e too disappeared. Nothing left of him but my memoiries from that day forward. Nothing left to do but sink down into complete submission. A numbness beyond death. That is my mind.
That's all I have to write about...I suppose I'm done now...
Lost,
Shifironodenmaru
December 19
"If you do it, I'll leave."
"No you won't, boy stop lying."
"I'm completely serious, dad. I'll leave."
"Isaac..perhaps...he is serious.."
"Nonsense, Kane."
"It isn't nonsense, dad!"
"You see? He's not kidding."
"We'll see then, Arden. We'll see."
"Hmph."
The voices of my Father, my Mother, and my older brother echoed through the hallways into my room. Their comtemplation of this painful matter kept me awake. Of course when conserning me, nothing is simple. Everyone has sacrificed something for me, has even given away their most precious belonging to spare me...except for my Father. He has given nothing, yet taken so much. I begin crying, self hatred washing through me once again, for causing m family so much distress. Arden comes quickly to my room. He lifts me from my bed, with one arm.
"Stop crying, Noden. It's not your fault."
"It is..."
"It is not. Stop blaming yourself right now."
"O-okay.."
I choke back my tears and wipe my face, he smiles at me. I notice he's missing two of his front teeth. I tentatively ask him what happened. He explains that he lost them in a fight. I'll be it was because of me. He sets me down again and leans against me bed, pushing his oddly long blonde hair behind his ear.
"Can you sleep now, Noden?"
"Will you stay untill I do?"
"Yeah, I can do that."
He sta on the edge of my bed and decided to hum a song he wrote for me at that moment. I fell asleep quickly, so I know not how long he was there. But I'm sure it was a while because one day he told me how he enjoys watching me sleep. The next day I woke to the sound of Arden screaming at the top of his lungs. It hurt his throat I could tell. My Mother spoke next when he stopped.
"Arden, baby please. There's nothing we can do. We need the money..."
"So your going to sell my baby brother?! He's not even a year old!"
"I know...this isn't easy for me either..."
"But your going to allow it! Your going to let them take him! Just snatch him from our lives and act like he was never there? Don't you think he might remember us?!"
"He's too young to remember this..."
"How would you know? You don't talk to him! You don't even tuck him in at night. Your not by his side when he cries! You act like you don't recognize his face when you see him!"
"Arden...please..."
As I sat up, tears beginning to fill my eyes, I heard my Fathers voice boom throughout the house. I flinched, quietly, I had to see. I had to know. I had to see their faces one last time. I climbed out of bed and padded down the hall, to the kitchen where they held every argument.
"Your not making this any easier, Arden."
"So!? Your selling your own flesh and blood."
"Oh my god...we're horrible people..."
My Mother began to cry, bloody tears escaped her eyes, falling through the curtain of snow white hair that framed her face. My big brother glared at her briefely, before realizing that she too, was feeling quite upset about this. That his true enemy was only Father.
"Your trying to tear us all apart aren't you?"
"Why would I be trying to tear apart my own family?"
"Your giving up both of your sons. And slowly killing your wife. You tell me."
"Stop talking."
My Father turned and stalked out of the room ending the conversation. Arden turned to my Mother and spoke softly. Questioning when they were coming to take me. She spoke quietly as well, he looked over at me.
"Go get dressed."
"What for, Arden?"
"Now, Noden."
I nodded briskly and rushed off to my room, changing as uickly as possible. He came in a few moments later, stuffing money into my pocket. He beckoned me to follow him, after I had put on my shoes. He stopped at the kitchen doorway, where Mother stood, holding our coats, holding back tears.
"Good luck, I love you both."
"I love you too, mom."
"I love you Shifiro. I'm sorry."
"I love you too, Mother.."
She gave us our coats and kissed us quickly, before turning away. She couldn't handle watching us leave. I knew I walked slowly, but never slowly enough for Arden to pick me up and run with me. He ran briskly, making no sound. When he stopped his eyes were blank, aimless.
"Brother?"
"I love you, Noden."
"A-Arden?"
Before I knew it I was ripped from my brothers arms. By someone much larger, stronger than him. I screamed his name, when I began drifting from him, the part between us becoming greater and greater. I heard him say my name before e too disappeared. Nothing left of him but my memoiries from that day forward. Nothing left to do but sink down into complete submission. A numbness beyond death. That is my mind.
That's all I have to write about...I suppose I'm done now...
Lost,
Shifironodenmaru
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)